todd clark

How To Lead A Family Dream Session

What if you decided to give the same amount of creativity to your family as you do to your job?

How awesome would your family be?


From a decade of experience as a youth pastor and a decade of experience as a lead pastor, I have seen far too many families who give their everything to their career and their leftovers to their family.

I want to share something with you that I have done with my family each summer for the past 5 years.  This is the best thing I have done as a father to proactively lead my family.

It is something that you can easily do as well …


Five years ago I was away on vacation with my family in Lake Havasu, Arizona, and I became very convicted that I give my best time, energy & creativity to people and organizations other than my family.  So I decided right then and there to do something about it.

I grabbed some blank pieces of paper from the printer of the house we were staying at and made out a simple chart. What I essentially did was take some strategic planning materials we have used for our church and adapted it to fit my family.

Here is our original family dream session chart.

ColeClarkDreamSession                                                                                                 Cole’s Chart – 2010  

In this original dream session we spent 90 minutes talking about three sections …

– Key People: Who are some key people or families that we really respect and look up to? These are often people we know. But sometimes they are people like comedian Tim Hawkins whom we have never met but we are all inspired by!

– Key Qualities: We then spend 30 minutes talking about all the reasons we respect and admire these people.

– Plan / Action Steps: Then we talk about which single attribute of these people that we admire and would like to weave into the fabric of our lives and family.

Three weeks ago I updated this dream session and put into play a version of the Patterson Strat Opp “4 Helpfuls” exercise for my family.


Here is a photo of our Family Dream Session this summer of 2015.


We spent two hours talking through these top four categories for our family.

– What’s Right: Let’s amplify those things.
– What’s Wrong: Let’s fix those things.
– What’s Confused: Let’s clarify those things.
– What’s Missing: Let’s add those things.

Then we spent a few days thinking and considering the four categories for our own individual lives. We came back together 48 hours later and talked about what’s right, wrong, confused and missing in our own personal lives.

It was an incredible, eye opening experience for our family.

You still have time to lead your family through a DREAM SESSION this summer. 


Why not give it a try? I promise you won’t be sorry as you proactively make personal and family plans!

[Tweet “Is 32:8 – But the noble man makes noble plans, and by noble deeds he stands.”]


  • Jean Robertson Reply
    June 9, 2016

    I remember when you did this at CCV. I was trying to find it and do with my boys. Thanks for posting!

  • […] One of the things we made room for is a family dream session. We have done these together for the last 7 summers. (You can read all about leading a family dream session here.) […]

  • Eric Schneider Reply
    October 17, 2016

    In seasons of uncertainty, restlessness, or whatever crossroads come up in life, marriage, ministry, etc. I always come back to this and it helps offer clarity and direction for the future. Thanks for sharing your wisdom and insight with the rest of us.

    I’ve always had a ton of respect for you and your fam since our paths crossed at CCV. Hope all is well!

  • […] you’d like to know more, I have written a whole post called “How To Lead A Family Dream Session.” Check it […]

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

todd clark


Get regular thoughts, tips, & testimonies and start living the curious life you were meant to live.

Get weekly thoughts, tips, & testimonies & start living the adventuresome life you know you were meant to live.